I am getting ready for work right now and i can't find my hairbrush. This begs the questions, did I leave it at work Saturday night? Which in turn begs the question, have I not brushed my hair since Saturday night??
Ponderingly yours,
Blogger Extraordinare
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
BUTTER, etc
Hey guys!
So... more observations on the Aussies. They butter everything. When it's gotten to the point where even I'm grossed out, you know its bad. They put butter on banana bread, ham sandwiches, etc.... I finally drew the line at work the other day when someone ordered peanut-butter toast, and Steve BUTTERED the bread before putting on PB. Ew.
Here's what happened to me today:
1. Worked at the coffee shop. Had a brownie for breakfast.
2. Worked at the restaurant. Was forced to clean toilets, which was degrading. But not as degrading as the look my manager gave me when I responded to the toilet-cleaning request with something akin to "Are you f---ing kidding me?"
3. Turned these:
into this:
Woohooo go me!
Also shout-out to Marita and Kev for sending me Silly Bandz and Amurrcan candy!!
I welcome more packages from Stateside. Just saying.
PEACE OUT.
PS I miss this:
Love you 1506!
So... more observations on the Aussies. They butter everything. When it's gotten to the point where even I'm grossed out, you know its bad. They put butter on banana bread, ham sandwiches, etc.... I finally drew the line at work the other day when someone ordered peanut-butter toast, and Steve BUTTERED the bread before putting on PB. Ew.
Here's what happened to me today:
1. Worked at the coffee shop. Had a brownie for breakfast.
2. Worked at the restaurant. Was forced to clean toilets, which was degrading. But not as degrading as the look my manager gave me when I responded to the toilet-cleaning request with something akin to "Are you f---ing kidding me?"
3. Turned these:
into this:
Woohooo go me!
Also shout-out to Marita and Kev for sending me Silly Bandz and Amurrcan candy!!
I welcome more packages from Stateside. Just saying.
PEACE OUT.
PS I miss this:
Love you 1506!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Awkward things
1. Yesterday at work, I asked one of the chefs what he had done on his day off. I thought he said, "Just played with myself" so I said "ew." Turns out he said "played with my son." Whoops.
2. Australian TV subtitles any English speaker with a remotely foreign accent. WTF? For a country full of so many people from all over the world, there is a lot of crazy ig'nant shit and racism.
K that was my deep thought for the day. Here's the Opera House.
XOXO
2. Australian TV subtitles any English speaker with a remotely foreign accent. WTF? For a country full of so many people from all over the world, there is a lot of crazy ig'nant shit and racism.
K that was my deep thought for the day. Here's the Opera House.
XOXO
Monday, October 18, 2010
Monday Funday
Hello readers! Firstly, I just want to say that Monday is my new favorite day of the week. I work three hours in the morning, and then have a glorious weekday afternoon and evening to frolic. Details of today's adventures to follow.
Secondly, I want to shout out to the lovely and talented JCo, whose email made my night. Love you!
Thirdly and most exciting, I learned to surf yesterday! Sadly, I don't have any photos, but just picture it pretty much like this:
Only, you know, with even more toned abs.
Aaaaanyway-- surfing lesson yesterday at Boat Harbour Park was sweet. Today I worked at the coffee shop in the AM, then went for yet another coastal walk. As ever, the scenery was gorge. The route was from home in North Bondi to "the Gap," where Sydney Harbour opens out to the Pacific. Here is the map:
It was indeed really pretty, but honestly, there's only so many oceanside cliffs one can look at in an afternoon, AND most of the route was uphill, so by the time we got to Watson's Bay, a gelato reward was very much in order. OMG the bitch at the gelato place was so rude though. After me and Alex both had sampled 2 flavors and asked for another, she was like "So are you guys going to buy anything?" I was about to walk out when she said that. A) I didn't realize sampling was contingent upon an imminent purchase, and B) way to imply that we're chintsy freeloaders or something. UGH.
After that, we hit up the Nighttime Noodle Markets in Hyde Park downtown, then played chess (I lost) at a bar called Pocket, where I saw my first Aussie midget. All in all, a successful day, and now I am tired and ready for bed. Obvi I will subject you to a few more photos before I go.
Love it!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Secondly, I want to shout out to the lovely and talented JCo, whose email made my night. Love you!
Thirdly and most exciting, I learned to surf yesterday! Sadly, I don't have any photos, but just picture it pretty much like this:
Only, you know, with even more toned abs.
Aaaaanyway-- surfing lesson yesterday at Boat Harbour Park was sweet. Today I worked at the coffee shop in the AM, then went for yet another coastal walk. As ever, the scenery was gorge. The route was from home in North Bondi to "the Gap," where Sydney Harbour opens out to the Pacific. Here is the map:
It was indeed really pretty, but honestly, there's only so many oceanside cliffs one can look at in an afternoon, AND most of the route was uphill, so by the time we got to Watson's Bay, a gelato reward was very much in order. OMG the bitch at the gelato place was so rude though. After me and Alex both had sampled 2 flavors and asked for another, she was like "So are you guys going to buy anything?" I was about to walk out when she said that. A) I didn't realize sampling was contingent upon an imminent purchase, and B) way to imply that we're chintsy freeloaders or something. UGH.
After that, we hit up the Nighttime Noodle Markets in Hyde Park downtown, then played chess (I lost) at a bar called Pocket, where I saw my first Aussie midget. All in all, a successful day, and now I am tired and ready for bed. Obvi I will subject you to a few more photos before I go.
Love it!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Rejoice podophiles!
That word in the title means "foot fetishists," and I am shouting-out to them because today's post has a distinct podiatric flavor. I have not one but two (!!) pieces of foot news. The first and arguably less exciting is my new shoes. They were $8 from K-mart.
They are sweet.
Item 2 is not for the faint of heart. Or the short of attention span. Last night, after an incident in which I feared the loss of my life first at the hands of Alex driving on the Sydney roads and secondly at Housemate Anne's wrath after she discovered he had driven her van, I was at Cole's doing some grocery shopping. As I perused the selection of muesli bars (vom. I miss Fiber Plus! Maura??) I somehow injured my foot. I actually stepped on it with my other foot, I think. I wasn't really even thinking about it, and it didn't hurt, but then I looked down to investigate and blood was dripping off my right foot, all over the base of my flip-flop and into the aisle. At first I was just like WTF? How is this cut so deep? And then, to the surprise of no one who remembers the Blood Draw Incident of 2009 or other similar moments of shame, I started to get light-headed and sat down to try to get my head on straight. My vision kept getting blurry and my hearing and fading out, and...... then I came to on the floor, hearing "assistance needed on aisle six" over the PA. Awesome. Some manager named Arthur came over and was very attentive and worried. I kind of felt bad for him because he was making such a fuss over me, but then I realized the excitement, as well as the opportunity to whip out the first-aid kit, probably made his night. In the end, he had me "write a statement" and give my name and address. He probably heard my American accent and assumed I was going to sue. (I was surprised I didn't even score free groceries out of the deal, I'll admit.) ANYWAY. My foot hurts. Here is a picture of my gash:
Some further insights and anecdotes:
1. Ozzies call goosebumps "chicken skin."
2. In an event which has been foreshadowed since my mom (Hi Mom! If you're reading) stopped me on my way to school in second grade because my hair looked like "a rat's nest," I was told off at work for my hair not being neat enough. Shocker, right? I now apply hairspray in such proportions that my hair has the texture of a football helmet during my shift. Oh well. It could act as a shield in the event of projectiles.
3. Sunday = day off. This week, I went with Ranger Alex, Housemate Anne, British Steve, and Maybe-Midget Natalie to this beach called Mallabar and did a bush-walk. My first! It was purty. Here are some pics:
They are sweet.
Item 2 is not for the faint of heart. Or the short of attention span. Last night, after an incident in which I feared the loss of my life first at the hands of Alex driving on the Sydney roads and secondly at Housemate Anne's wrath after she discovered he had driven her van, I was at Cole's doing some grocery shopping. As I perused the selection of muesli bars (vom. I miss Fiber Plus! Maura??) I somehow injured my foot. I actually stepped on it with my other foot, I think. I wasn't really even thinking about it, and it didn't hurt, but then I looked down to investigate and blood was dripping off my right foot, all over the base of my flip-flop and into the aisle. At first I was just like WTF? How is this cut so deep? And then, to the surprise of no one who remembers the Blood Draw Incident of 2009 or other similar moments of shame, I started to get light-headed and sat down to try to get my head on straight. My vision kept getting blurry and my hearing and fading out, and...... then I came to on the floor, hearing "assistance needed on aisle six" over the PA. Awesome. Some manager named Arthur came over and was very attentive and worried. I kind of felt bad for him because he was making such a fuss over me, but then I realized the excitement, as well as the opportunity to whip out the first-aid kit, probably made his night. In the end, he had me "write a statement" and give my name and address. He probably heard my American accent and assumed I was going to sue. (I was surprised I didn't even score free groceries out of the deal, I'll admit.) ANYWAY. My foot hurts. Here is a picture of my gash:
Some further insights and anecdotes:
1. Ozzies call goosebumps "chicken skin."
2. In an event which has been foreshadowed since my mom (Hi Mom! If you're reading) stopped me on my way to school in second grade because my hair looked like "a rat's nest," I was told off at work for my hair not being neat enough. Shocker, right? I now apply hairspray in such proportions that my hair has the texture of a football helmet during my shift. Oh well. It could act as a shield in the event of projectiles.
3. Sunday = day off. This week, I went with Ranger Alex, Housemate Anne, British Steve, and Maybe-Midget Natalie to this beach called Mallabar and did a bush-walk. My first! It was purty. Here are some pics:
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Avocado rhymes with tomato and other insights
Hello all! It is currently 6:22am and I am sitting at the kitchen table drinking Diet Pepsi straight from the 2-liter (4 for $5 at Coles, what what!!). I will be working for like the next 18 hours straight--bleh--so I figured I'd stop in and say hi. And also share with you an anecdote wherein:
1. Ranger Alex buys 4 pairs of socks in Kings Cross for $4
2. R.A. then accuses me of losing them, accidentally throwing them out, etc
3. Three days later, said socks are found, in their original packaging, in the FRIDGE. Someone got a little hasty reaching for the bacon packet after work one night, it seems!
Anyway, that's it except:
- I sneezed all day yesterday and I still hate that cat.
- I get paid today!!
In closing, here is a picture of a man doing a choreographed dance with a crane outside the opera house. LOVE it.
Love, Margo
1. Ranger Alex buys 4 pairs of socks in Kings Cross for $4
2. R.A. then accuses me of losing them, accidentally throwing them out, etc
3. Three days later, said socks are found, in their original packaging, in the FRIDGE. Someone got a little hasty reaching for the bacon packet after work one night, it seems!
Anyway, that's it except:
- I sneezed all day yesterday and I still hate that cat.
- I get paid today!!
In closing, here is a picture of a man doing a choreographed dance with a crane outside the opera house. LOVE it.
Love, Margo
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Hump Day
Just a few things to share today.
This is my street:
Y mi casa:
I love love love living in Bondi. Even when, as happened today, the local McDonald's runs out of ice cream and cannot supply me with a McFlurry. (Lesson from the trenches: Burger King makes an almost identical product called the Storm. CHECK!)
Finally, this is the Cat.
I have a strong distrust/animosity for this animal. His name, I shit you not, is Jizz. Despite my repeated demonstrations that this animal is not welcome in my personal space or near my belongings, I frequently pick up articles of clothing to find them covered in white hairs. Currently taking suggestions for how I can stage Jizz's death and (this is crucial) make it look like an accident.
That is all.
Mucho amor!
PS I ate 4 servings of fruit today. I rock.
This is my street:
Y mi casa:
I love love love living in Bondi. Even when, as happened today, the local McDonald's runs out of ice cream and cannot supply me with a McFlurry. (Lesson from the trenches: Burger King makes an almost identical product called the Storm. CHECK!)
Finally, this is the Cat.
I have a strong distrust/animosity for this animal. His name, I shit you not, is Jizz. Despite my repeated demonstrations that this animal is not welcome in my personal space or near my belongings, I frequently pick up articles of clothing to find them covered in white hairs. Currently taking suggestions for how I can stage Jizz's death and (this is crucial) make it look like an accident.
That is all.
Mucho amor!
PS I ate 4 servings of fruit today. I rock.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
More Milestones
Went for my first run today since arriving almost a month ago. I've been carrying my running shoes since landing, and they have been mocking me as they gather dust. However, I feel the lapse in working out is somewhat mitigated since I've been super-busy with job search, general exploring, and my morning job. So it's not as though I've been sitting on my arse eating Tim-Tams. (Most of the time.) Anyway, had the afternoon off today and the weather was beautiful, so I thought it an excellent opportunity. Here is my run:
Notice how I've measured it in km? I decided it's better to just learn to live life in the metric system/Celsius rather than trying to convert all the time. Anyway, I was pleased because I went about 5k. I was NOT pleased when, upon my return to the Shack at Wairoa, housemate Anne was like "Is that you back already?" The "already" nettled me a bit and I wanted to be like "Um, YES bitch. How far have YOU run today?" Meow! But I fought my baser instincts.
Anyway, today was an excellent day in that I worked, went to the beach (!), AND got everything on my to-do list done. Okay, I'm tired of time off now and want to go back to working doubles every day. At least that way I've got enough $$ to support my Tim-Tams addiction. Below is the aforementioned confection in all its addicting glory:
Peace out my little chickens!
Notice how I've measured it in km? I decided it's better to just learn to live life in the metric system/Celsius rather than trying to convert all the time. Anyway, I was pleased because I went about 5k. I was NOT pleased when, upon my return to the Shack at Wairoa, housemate Anne was like "Is that you back already?" The "already" nettled me a bit and I wanted to be like "Um, YES bitch. How far have YOU run today?" Meow! But I fought my baser instincts.
Anyway, today was an excellent day in that I worked, went to the beach (!), AND got everything on my to-do list done. Okay, I'm tired of time off now and want to go back to working doubles every day. At least that way I've got enough $$ to support my Tim-Tams addiction. Below is the aforementioned confection in all its addicting glory:
Peace out my little chickens!
Sunday, October 3, 2010
3 weeks, 2 couches, and 1 futon later....
Hey y'all
I am starting a blog of my Australian life. This ensures that a) I can still write/post stuff that is too mundane to clog the inboxes of my nearest and dearest, b) my friends can all have another time-waster blog to read at work, and c) my writing can find a wider audience, so more people than just me can laugh at my jokes.
Anyway, I landed in Oz about three and a half weeks ago. I am on a yearlong work-and-holiday visa, so--ahhh!!--I have only about 11 months left Down Undah.
THE PLAN: get a job here in Sydney, work nights, frolic/lounge on the beach/explore during the day all summer. Once summer ends, I want to travel up the east coast, go to the outback and whatnot, and also visit some parts of Western Australia. This country is seriously BIG. And FAR from everywhere. Their local vacation destination is Thailand, which is still a 10-hour flight away. Ker-ist. Anyway, after using up my year here in Oz, I'd like to go to Southeast Asia, and maybe Fiji. Etc Etc.
Here's how it's been going.
Job 1: barista/waitress at a cafe in the downtown neighborhood of Surry Hills. I work 7:30-10:30 every morning, which is a bitch, but it pays cash and my boss is really nice (his bad, repetitive jokes aside.) He also hired me when I had no idea how to make coffee and has been training me, so I feel kinda bad deserting him. IDK how long I can stay on this wake-up-at-6am schedule, though. Bleh
Job 2: After a lengthy search and a few failed "trials" (this really nerve-wracking part of the hiring process here, where they'll basically throw you behind the bar/out on the floor of a restaurant and make you do stuff), I got a job at a fancy restaurant on the 36th floor of a hotel in the harbour. However, the hours were loooong, the pay was bad, the uniform degrading, and the freebies non-existent, so I started looking around for other stuff. Eventually got hired on at the same restaurant and fellow traveller Ranger Alex, who is now frightened that I will make him redundant. Eek-- let's hope not! We are both currently working on memorizing all this info about the fancy dishes served at Bel Mondo, our place of employment. I can go into great detail on the process behind "aubergine ragout" and "elderflower granita." Yay for life skills!!
Milestones this week:
1. I survived on 4 hours of sleep for like 5 days running. Survive being a generous term for someone who was constantly as grumpy as I was. However, I slept about 12 hours yesterday and am gloriously refreshed, and ready to start it all over tomorrow!
2. On Monday I was left alone to run the coffee shop by myself--for all of 15 minutes while Steve (the bossman) ran to the shop, but still! I am slowly proving myself as capable of not burning the place down, which is an excellent skill to complement my newfound ability to toast a croissant.
3. In celebration of my morning of triumph, Alex and I did the Bondi-to-Coogee coastal walk on Monday afternoon. It was sooo pretty, and we did it at the perfect time; the sun was setting as we were walking south. I loved it. Pictures below. Please forgive if the formatting is non-sensical, as I am just working out this blogger stuff.
Here we have some random cliff, and then the lovely Tamarama Beach, next stop on our walking tour of the Eastern beaches.
more pretty pictures. sorry, i cannot figure out how this formatting works AT ALL.
okay now I am done. One more picture of the sunset at Coogee Beach, then I'm signing off. I wouldn't call this first post a raging success, since I don't know why this blasted text is underlined, nor can I figure out how to make the photos go how I want them. 
I think "Work in progress" is the most apt summation at this stage.
I think "Work in progress" is the most apt summation at this stage. Okay, I am going to go enjoy my day off. Will try to drag the Ranger to see "Easy A." It's cheap movie day in Sydney at $9AUD. PS it is also labour day here so happy LD!
-marge
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